The Reel Deal and Other Bad Jokes
Tuesday, June 15, 2004
"I find your lack of faith disturbing."
Last post's quote was from "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban," which like the other two, was not as good as the book. This quote may also be painfully obvious, but some may not get it *cough* Jenn *cough*.
More funny animals!
Coming soon from a bunch of asshole parody filmmakers near you: Divine Clerks! Jesus is Dante. "I'm not even supposed to be here today!" St. Peter is Randall. Snootchin' it to the nootch, it's Satan and Silent God. "I'm gonna corrupt this soul, I'm gonna corrupt that soul, I'm gonna corrupt ANYTHING THAT MOVES!"
"Who wants to know?"
"I'm Alandria. I run the Prism Theater in Gate City. Lately we--" She was interrupted by a the loud sound of wood breaking. Over someone's head. I held up a finger.
"Could you hold that thought?"
Kahnrad was having his arms and legs held by four burly goblins. The other two were taking turns breaking things over his head. Maybe they wanted what was inside. But Kahnrad's head is a tough nut to crack. I hustled over.
I grabbed one the goblin holding Kahnrad's left leg and punched it in the face. Then I hit two more goblins with him. The other three prepared for battle. By this, I mean one prepared for battle while the other two edged backwards while the brave one distracted me. I picked up a table and threw it like a discus, folding the three goblins like a bad hand of poker. Kahnrad got painfully to his feet.
"I'm surprised you could take your eyes off that piece of work long enough to figure out that you should be giving a shit about your partner," Kahnrad groused. I shrugged and walked back to Alandria.
"I'm the Maceman. What do you want?"
Alandria's mouth twisted. "I'll get right to the point, Mr. Mace. Somebody is killing my actors."