The Reel Deal and Other Bad Jokes
Monday, April 19, 2004
The blog that will drag the world kicking and screaming into the Century of the Fruitbat
Greetings from beyond midnight. Nine minutes to be precise. I have created this blog for various purposes. These include but are not limited to: getting attention, getting laid, getting someone to listen to me, and...Oh, hell, they're all variations of "getting attention." I'm a natural performer. Except for the whole "stay at home and mastur--master foreign languages" thing, of course.
I intend to talk about many things in this blog, because I don't really think I should limit myself. That's right, I'll talk about video games AND movies! I'm on the cutting edge of fuckin' journalism now, ain't I?
Seriously though (imagine a little man standing on my shoulder who coughs "Horseshit!" into his fist whenever I say anything about being serious) I will also talk about my life. The interesting things. I mean the things that I find interesting. You may not think attending tuxedo parties, sneaking about in criminal masterminds' fortresses, and making love to exotic women is exciting, but it is after all the humble affair I like to term "my life."
All right, I'll start over. You'll hear about how I get laid all the time. About how I attract admiring stares from everyone in the street. About--
Let me start over. I'm going to talk about the things that my life is filled with: wine, women and song, sword and sorcery, dungeons and dragons, and homework that gets done on time.
Last start over. Movies, making movies, learning how to make movies, maybe a bit about video games, my ideas for movies and books and comic strips and video games, the fairer sex (the few that I encounter on an "Hi, I know you," basis), bad jokes I made in my day, humorous (or just stupid) observations of mine, and that's about it. If you encounter anything else let me know. I'm trying to run a specialized blog here.
Note: this and a few of the following posts were previously posted a while back on a different, unsatisfactory URL.